Dear Diary,

Today was a very productive day. I got up and went to work as usual. I was working with Bridget today, the human from the third floor. She’s really nice and is always a lot of fun to work with, she even laughs at all of my cheesy puns and word plays.

She is one of the few people that thinks that it was funny that one time when someone handed me orange juice with pulp and I told them that I hated Pulp so much I wish it was Fiction. Most people just roll their eyes or facepalm at my jokes. It was a long but good work day and at the end we clocked out and Bridget’s mom came to pick her up and even gave me a ride to the Transit Center where I catch my bus. She was so nice. I said goodbye to Bridget and Mrs. Dubois and hopped on the 27 South towards home.

I was looking for a seat when someone tapped me on the shoulder. I turned around confusedly to see that Lobsty was on the bus too, he must have gotten off early, State Farm usually keeps him a bit later than when I usually get off. We talked about work and he told me about his friend Christine from State Farm that sat next to Jake from State Farm which is weird, because he usually works at 3 in the morning.

My mom was working late tonight so I decided to cook dinner for her and the rest of the muggles I live with. I said bye to Lobsty and got off the bus and headed to the Quick Stop to get some groceries for dinner. The Quik Stop is our local mini mart. it’s owned by Mr. Smith um … Kevin, I think.

I headed toward the produce aisle to get some scallions and serrano chiles, when there was a loud rolling noise. I looked up and it was a watermelon avalanche. I yelped and barely jumped out of the worst of it. To the humans it was nothing, but I’m quite a bit slighter in stature, to say the least. I couldn’t get over the blockade so I headed towards the freezer aisle as an alternative.

Since I am so small, I had to jump from shelf to shelf and when I was almost there, a human knocked the door closed.

I was scared and pounded on the glass. They turned around and let me out and apologized frantically. I said it was okay, I mean accidents happen, and they helped me to grab the items I needed. I went to the self checkout and purchased my items.

I called my grandma to give me a ride home. She took my uncle Dave’s hot rod to pick me up and on the way home the car started sputtering. I got up and took a look under the hood.

I messed around with a few things. I don’t really know anything about cars but then I got back in the car and my grandma tried again and miraculously it started up just fine. Grandma dropped me off at home and I walk past my cloom to the kitchen and begin chopping the chilis.

I put all of the ingredients in the crockpot for my Cajun Seafood Explosion Chowder (Registered Trademark of KoonKoon Enterprises, LLC) and turned my attention to the main course.

I can’t use the wok because its so big that it got stuck in it once.

I grilled the steaks to a perfect succulent medium-rare mmm they were dripping, I couldn’t wait.

My mom came home and dinner was delicious, my mom relaxed with a Bloody Mary that I made for her, only I used a bacon and green olive skewer that I made her, because she doesn’t like celery; she says it tastes like water.

It was a great day diary.

Goodnight Diary Until Tomorrow,

KoonKoon The Master Chef